Cascada

"She was like poetry - like prose, like love letters and lyrics - cascading down the page." -Ugly Love by Colleen Hoover

That moment where someone across the room catches your eye; your breath quickens, your thoughts jumble, your stomach turns. I am not reticent to admit I have always loved that feeling. The meet cute. It's what sets the stage; everything after is just that...after. 

The initial cascade of emotions is intense and raw, rippling over you like a waterfall, drenching you fully. You can feel it from your head down to your toes, millions of nerves branching from your center, completely on fire. 

After 5 years of marriage to my Lizard, he remains my rock, my present and future, and the best part of my day. I LOVE my husband, and though we are light years removed from our own meet cute, there are many moments where I am transported right back to that day. I am not without gratitude for knowing I am who I am because of him. 

Yet. Lizard is human (not an actual reptile), and there has been inevitable disappointment, mountain peaks and very low valleys in our relationship, and if I put him on a pedestal, the only place he has to go is down. I have made an inordinate number of mistakes during our time together, thrown irretrievable verbal daggers, and am acutely aware that he has chosen to overlook these catastrophic incidences for a future with me. I have never been perfect, but neither is he. Like me, he is not without flaws. And there has been real hurt there. 

But what I have gained in my 40+ years on this earth is that we all need people in our lives. It is impossible for one person to embody all which we need, yearn for, and even love. I cannot rely on him, or anyone, to provide for all that I seek. Our lives are enriched through the relationships we develop with others, and regardless of my interactions throughout the day, I know I want to lay my head next to his every night. 

And that's enough.